I welcomest thou
and praisest thou
for giving unto me
an excuse,
nay an explanation,
nay a justification
for my in progress
male-pattern balding,
unexcused by my previous 26 years.
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the sieve and the sand 
there is something magical about being 27 (because its almost 30) that makes it alright to be balding where 26 (because its much more like 25) doesn’t offer the same grace.
congrats
I agree mugs; this is one of the first birthdays in which the day makes a difference, separating my past and future lives.