i wish that i were a vampire
but of an entirely different sort;
not possessed of boyish good looks
and not one that plays by the books;
not your normal vampire douche
and definitely not from Belarus;
content merely to sleep all day
and drink a little blood along the way;
not worrying about what would happen tomorrow
because i would have known enough sorrow
from living throughout recorded history
but always as an unfathomable mystery.