One More Worry

August 19, 2008

We already fear shooters, stabbers,
stranglers, drunken drivers,
binders, torturers, and killers,
stray bullets, space junk,
salmonella, killer bees,
cops, snakes,
hospitals, airplanes,
elevators, subways,
shopping malls, and bridges, to name a few.
Now there are folks in Africa thieving penises.

“I think of you as a brother,” SHE says

The words-like a spell-unlocked FEAR

Which attacked my heart relentlessly

To the point where I have now died my first death

*

I am dead inside

My heart bleeds profusely til the blood is no more

MY FEAR has taken solid form

And now exists to torture me

*

“I think of you not as a sister,

But something much more than that,”

I wish to say, but

My heart’s voice is being strangled

*

Did I speak far too soon?

Or did I speak far too late?

Did I release myself too quickly

Resulting in not relief, but the emptiness I feel now?

*

The Hurricane of Tragedy has broken

The Levees of my heart

Which suppressed my innermost emotions

Now the light which should guide me

To safe ground, has been Relinquished

And through the dark I must move alone

hymn

July 17, 2008

the darkness of my blackened soul
what fear of love
and shame of loss
that i should forth my self its lame
but wallow in this earthen fame

you grace my heart rejoice my weakness
given my pride
and forthright guile
if i should seek myself once more
you should turn your face and me abhor

oh life of loss
so filled my fears
that i called out in shame and tears
to know my life a passing shame
to know your son for me he came

Hos-piss

June 25, 2008

Hospice

A word with all the powers of a magnet

Drawing things together

Somethings are shunned and wish to be repelled

But they always return

Others are accepted easily

But can never come back

Everything attracted has something in common

Power to express emotions

Love

Pain

Fear

Last wishes-like fire-are warm

But too much fire surrounding one self becomes

The source of more love

The source of more pain

The source of more fear

The smoke becomes a heavy blanket

Smothering its starter

To reduce the burden a stand must be made

One of courage where friends may be hurt

You can piss out the fire

But you cant piss out the pain

Great difficulty lies on the path where you try to be kind and loving

But sacrifices must be made

To live the rest of ones days with only the closest people to their heart.