I never needed to win
being on top of things was too uncomfortable
yet there was the possibility of life
at the back of my mind.

The person I wanted to be
standing across the street, waiting for the green light
was so real.
While engrossed in nervous greed to make his smile mine,
worry sucked the glow out of my soul
I lost sight of all things true

Something is happening without me,
with the friends left behind
the dreams I dreamt
the children starving in far away lands

The sunlight has me recoiling inside myself
looking for the perfect escape
but it is nothing important or new,
only little sharp pains
to enjoy rainy days,
coins lying down on the pavement,
and fruits a bit too ripe.